HAMPTON BAYS, NY — A family mourning the loss of a beloved Hampton Bays man to the coronavirus found comfort in a caring nurse who reached out to them after his death and shared his last moments — reassuring them that he did not die alone.

Danielle Carroll, on the Facebook page, “In Memory of John Carroll,” shared the story of love and kindness.

“One of Daddy’s nurses reached out to me,” she wrote. “I wanted to share with you the very emotional message she sent me.”

With his family unable to visit her father John Carroll, 65, Danielle said the nurse’s message was a gift from the heart: “I wanted to reach out to you and your family personally during this very difficult time,” his nurse wrote.

“First, I want to express my deepest sympathy for the loss of your dad,” she said. “I could hear very clearly how much he meant to all of you through all of the phone conversations that you and your family had with him on his final days. I could feel the immense amount of love and I am sure he was a very special man to you all. Again, I cannot express my sympathy enough.

“I want you to know that I know how difficult it must have been for you and your family to not be able to come in to say good-bye in person. But I also want you and your family to know that I was there for your dad, your brother, your son, your cousin, your friend. I want you to know that he heard you — all of you — and he heard all of your conversations and all of your good-byes. He did not pass away alone. I was with him the whole time, during his final moments. I held his hand and told him it was going to be okay. I want you to know he was comfortable and at peace. He did not suffer during his final moments.”

The caring nurse said she just wanted to reach out to his family “in hopes that it would provide some sort of peace for you all. The love you all expressed to him was heard, and it was felt! And I just wanted you to know that you all provided exactly what he needed. God bless you all, and I hope this provided some closure and peace for you.”

Danielle Carroll, John’s daughter, said she and her sister, Melissa, as well as the rest of her father’s family, including his parents, who are 90 and 91 years old, are devastated by his loss.

Her father, a retired plumber, had COPD, and, when he became disoriented in late March, was taken to the hospital by ambulance and admitted directly into the ICU. During the week that he was hospitalized before he died on March 27, Danielle said her father was on a ventilator and intubated the entire time.

The nurse who sent the message and another nurse — both nurses are not identified due to privacy issues — both called all of Carroll’s relatives, including his daughters, his four siblings, and his parents, so that they would have a chance to speak to him one more time.

For that, Danielle said, she is eternally grateful. “I wouldn’t have gotten a chance to say good-bye.”

The day her father died, Danielle said, was beautiful, with blue skies and 60-degree weather. Her uncles in Florida also sent photos; the sky there was a vivid blue, too, she said.

Her mother, Danielle said, felt it was a sign; her father loved the Allman Brothers Band and the song “Blue Sky.” He passed soon after the family shared photos of the blue skies — and they believe it was a message.

“He wanted us to know he is okay,” Danielle said. “I think that was his way of saying he was there.”

Losing their beloved family member has been even more painful because, due to coronavirus protocols, no traditional wake or funeral can be held.

“He is part of a big family,” Danielle said. “So we are going to have a celebration of his life in the summer when we can all be together.”

(Video courtesy Carroll family)

Friends, however, organized a drive-by memorial; more than 90 cars passed by over a period of 15 minutes to honor her father, Danielle said.

“We were speechless,” she said.

Remembering her father, Danielle said he shared his love of blues music with her and her sister Melissa, taking them to music festivals in Riverhead and upstate: “There are so many memories.”

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Her also loved spending time with her sister Melissa’s family, including his granddaughters Haylee, 4, and Aubrey, 2. He loved taking the family to IHOP and he enjoyed days at the Ponquogue Bridge or the Shinnecock Canal looking for seals; he also loved fishing and hunting.

From her father, Danielle said she inherited his dry sense of humor.

“He was very quiet,” Danielle said, adding that she used to joke sarcastically that he “was a man of many words. But he said what he needed to say.”

The bond was strong, she said. “We were very close.”

Losing him, Danielle said, has been a shock. When he was first hospitalized, after they got the first test results, they had prayed for good news when his fever wasn’t high. Initially, the plan was that he wouldn’t remain intubated but then, everything moved quickly as his illness worsened.

Danielle said because she is an essential worker, she is forever grateful to her sister Melissa for being able to take all the calls from doctors and nurses. “I give her a lot of credit, and she will never know how truly thankful I am,” she said.

She and her family are still in shock at the sudden loss of the man who shaped their lives, Danielle said; the unthinkable loss runs deep.

“I say it every day, how much I loved him, how much I am going to miss him. But there is nothing I missed out on telling him,” Danielle said. “I feel content. We had a good relationship. I always told him I loved him and he always told me he loved me.”

When the coronavirus has passed, Danielle said her family will finally be able to grieve together. “Right now, we can’t even hug,” she said. “I can’t even go and hug my sister. When all this is over and we can hug each other again, that first hug is going to be a different kind of hug.”

Her father’s legacy will live forever, Danielle said. “My dad made me the woman I am today by teaching me to be a fearless, independent spirit with a will to go after what I want.”

After they heard their son was hospitalized, his parents, 90 and 91, came home from Florida where they were staying with their son Christopher Carroll, John’s brother.

“My mom said, ‘I want to go home and be near my son,'” brother Jim Carroll said. But John, he said, was hospitalized on March 20, his parents arrived back on March 23, and John died on March 27.

“All of us are devastated,” Jim said. “None of us could see him.”

Jim, too, is thankful to the nurse who gave him a chance to speak to his brother, one last time. “She got all suited up to enter his room,” he said. Then she used her own cell phone to call family members so they could say the final good-bye.

“It was horrible,” he said. “And so hard for my parents. They can’t be comforted.”

But even on the darkest days, the care shown by nurses meant everything — and the message about her father’s last moments, sent from a compassionate, caring nurse, was a gift beyond measure, Danielle said.

“I know how overwhelming and chaotic it must be at the hospital,” she said. “Even on the hardest days, I went her to remember how appreciated and loved she is by many just for doing that simple thing, without having to.”

Front line nurses, she said, “are doing such an amazing job for all the people that can’t be there for their families or friends. They’re being their family, their friends, for us,” she said.

Danielle said she can’t even read the nurse’s message without crying. “She was holding his hand,” she said. “Of course, I wish it had been me, but at least there was someone there with him. The love I have for this woman, I don’t even know how to put it into words, how kind she was. We need more people like her. She treated him as if he were her own dad. She is an angel.”